In January 2010, just over a year after Mark’s death, the reality started hitting that he was never ever going to come home.
I sought God’s presence like never before, read His word (the Bible) searching for comfort, and listened to worship music every chance I could. I knew that peace and the healing of my heart could only come from the One who had created me, who loved me and in whose eternal heavenly presence Mark was now living.
Opening the Bible one day I read Psalm 23, The Lord is my Shepherd. As I read the well-known Psalm I realised I had two choices. One: I could just read it, or two: I could believe it.
The following prayer, which now hangs on my wall, came out of that desperate time and my deliberate choice to believe God’s word…
“God, because Psalm 23 is true, I can completely relax in regards to my future, because it is written: You guide me along right paths bringing honour to Your name. To add to that, You promise to walk close beside me, protect and comfort me when I walk through the dark valley of death, all the time leading me beside peaceful streams, which I’m sure are found only in Your presence.
God, because Psalm 23 is true, I will choose from this day to walk in its truth, to rely completely on You as my shepherd.
To know and be thankful because I have everything I need but, on top of that, a cup which overflows with blessings.
To know You lead me, give me rest and strength, guide me, protect me, comfort me, welcome me, prepare a feast for me and pursue me with Your goodness and unfailing love.
I will know that I am completely provided for in every area, emotionally, spiritually, and physically because YOU ARE MY SHEPHERD.”