I am a planner – always have been and most probably always will be.  I believe this is a godly attribute as God himself is a planner 🙂

I do life happily by having something to aim towards – some of my goals are little and some are ridiculously huge.

As a couple this was how Mark and I worked as well.  We got married with the plan to do missions.  When we were out on the mission field we were always planning the next tour, the next gig, the next adventure.

When Mark got sick and we were told it was cancer and he was going to die I continued with my planning.  This time it was not happy planning but planning for a future that involved Mark getting sicker, dying, a funeral and then life after as a young widow with four small girls.  It might seem morbid – but I had a plan.

As most of you know life doesn’t often go to our plan and of course life didn’t with Marks illness taking a very unexpected turn with the diagnosis of brain damage caused by the radiation treatment.  When this happened we found ourselves in no man’s land.  There was no plan!  And what was worse there could be no plan!  The neurologist, the oncologist and we ourselves had no idea how this illness could evolve.

I was lost!   This among other things caused me to cope very badly with Marks illness (I won’t elaborate because it is in my book).  I had to let go of my natural instinct to plan and have a goal and instead blindly trust that God, my heavenly Father, had a plan and he had it all under control despite the fact I didn’t.

Yes I learnt a lot of things through that, and yes I did learn to trust in God.

So why am I bringing this up?  Well I had a plan – yep I had a plan for how I was going to do the next few years of life while I still had one daughter left at school.  I thought my plan was in line with what I felt God was leading me into and so thought it was all sorted.

But last Sunday after some time spent alone with God asking him about some issues that needed to be sorted out to keep my plan working, God said, “Drop it, this is not my will for you to continue to pursue this.  It is useless to me and therefore useless to you.  Let it go.”

If there is one thing I have learnt to be good at it’s obedience to God’s voice.  I knew he had said it and it actually confirmed what I had started to figure out because what I was pursuing was simply not working out.

So here I am with no plan.  I have no idea what I am supposed to do next.  I am trying to learn about marketing my book because God told me to write it so I figure I better work at selling it.  But other than that – there is nothing!

All I want to do with my life and my days is tell others about Jesus.  I want God to use me to encourage people to know God or know him better.  That was the vision statement behind the book.

I am very blessed in my job to work at a Christian Medical Centre and I get to talk to people about Jesus, pray for them and try as much as I can to show God’s love in between the very busy phone and the administration required to run a doctors clinic.

But I know God is getting me ready for a change but I have no clue what that is.

God says in the well-known verse in Jeremiah 29:11

plan for you

So even though I don’t have a plan – I can trust that my Saviour does, but there is a condition to me knowing that plan and it is found in the following verses in  Jeremiah 29 Verses 12-14  

call on me

So at present this is what I am doing.  I am calling on God, I am praying to God and I am seeking God, both to draw closer to him but also to discover his plan for my future and what he wants me to do next.  I am trying not to get frustrated (which is my natural tendency) and I am trying not to force anything.  And I am waiting.

God has a wonderful plan for EVERY single person’s life.  A plan that you can’t possibly imagine, and it will fulfil all the desires that are in your heart.  But the condition to finding this plan and living it is like the scripture said, it’s calling on God, praying to him and seeking for him.  When you discover God, which he has promised you will if you ask, then you will also discover the plan and the steps to that plan.  Sometimes you will have to wait and trust for the next step, like I am at the moment, but it will come if you just keep following Jesus.

And so I wait in eager anticipation for the plans and the next steps he has for me.  I’ll keep you posted!


Mission Impossible

Whenever I read those two words I instantly start humming the well-known theme music and having visions of Ethan Hunt swinging perilously above the floor of the CIA Headquarters in Langley, Virginia.

So what brought this up you may be wondering, well sometimes I feel like things that God has asked me to do are exactly that – Mission Impossible.  In my mind I start making plans that involve trapeze wire and a team of highly trained masterminds to enable me to accomplish the task ahead.

It’s not the first time (nor I dare say will it be the last) that God has given me a mission that is beyond my capabilities or resources.

Welcome to Poland!

Welcome to Poland!

When we travelled to Europe doing missions with the band, The Friendly’s, we never had any money to pay for the airfares and yet after a lot of prayer, faith and hard work raising awareness and support for our mission, the Lord always provided exactly the amount that was needed to pay for our airfares and extra luggage costs that always accompany a touring band.

The years of being caregiver for Mark were pretty much Mission Impossible but as I undertook the everyday tasks involved, God gave me the supernatural strength to keep on going.

2003 The day to day "Mission Impossible" of caring for Mark

2003 The day to day “Mission Impossible” of caring for Mark

There are many days when raising my daughters feels like Mission Impossible, but the bible says God gives wisdom to those who ask* making yet another assignment possible.

So you might be wondering what my ‘mission’ that seems impossible is at the moment, well it’s getting my book finished.  It was all very well and good writing it, but now we have to tidy it up, get a copy editor to fix it up, find a title that works and work on the cover.  Not to mention figuring our way around all the computer stuff involved in publishing an Ebook.  (Don’t even know what that is called so we will call it computer stuff for today.)

But seeing as I have been in this spot before, I do have some idea what I need to do, and that is: do the possible so that our incredible amazing God can do the impossible.

I love the story of Peter’s escape from prison found in the Bible in the book of Acts chapter 12.  Peter, a disciple of Jesus although by the extra security around him you would have thought he was some dangerous criminal, was in chains sound asleep awaiting trial the next morning for preaching about the resurrected Jesus.  Like an epic movie scene a bright light appeared in the cell and there stood an angel of the Lord. Apparently the dramatic entrance was not enough to wake Peter so the angel hit him in the side and yelled, “Quick, get up!”  Unbelievably the chains around Peter’s wrist fell off, then the angel instructed Peter to get dressed, put on his sandals, put on his cloak and follow him.  Peter dutifully obeyed thinking he was having an awesome dream and the angel led him out of the cell, passed all the guards, even the two that were beside Peter, through one gate and then another gate right up to the big iron gates that opened to the city.  Peter followed the angel out and then the angel vanished and it says in verse 11, Peter finally came to his senses. “It’s really true!” he said. “The Lord has sent his angel and saved me from Herod…”

Its all about taking the possible stepsNow what I always noticed about this amazing story was that Peter had to do the possible; he had to get up, put on his shoes, clothes and cloak and he had to move his legs and walk.  The angel did not miraculously dress him or carry him but the angel of the Lord did do the impossible.  He was Peter’s very own highly trained team because he appeared in a locked and secure prison, made the chains around Peters wrist fall off (didn’t even have to pick the lock – so cool!) and somehow blinded all the guards and then opened all the impenetrable gates.

Peter did the possible and the angel of the Lord did the impossible.

This is the plan for everything that Jesus puts on our hearts and gives us the passion to do.  We must do the possible – so I must write the book! God has already provided a small team of incredible and talented people to aid this mission and between us we must organise and figure out scary websites so that God can do the impossible by guiding us through the websites and giving us the creativity and inspiration we need and ultimately use the book to encourage others in their own journey through life and the trials that can come.

When we were organising the band’s tours and missions trips we had to do the possible of praying, believing in faith, raising support, booking plane tickets and packing, and then God did the impossible and paid the airfares.

1992 -Leaving for Amsterdam after watching God do the impossible and make a way for us to serve him with Youth With A Mission

1992 -Leaving for Amsterdam after watching God do the impossible and make a way for us to serve him with Youth With A Mission

It’s all about taking the possible steps.

So this is to encourage all you wonderful folk out there to do the possible to reach your dreams and desires that God has put on your heart, have the faith to believe, and then sit back and watch God do the impossible.

As the voice from the little box that will self-destruct in five seconds says, “your mission should you choose to accept it….”

Choose to accept it!!! It is truly an exciting way to live!!!

Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible,
but with God all things are possible.”
Matthew 19:26 New International Version (NIV)
Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen;
it gives us assurance about things we cannot see.
Hebrews 11:1 New Living Translation (NLT)
If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, and he will give it to you.
James 1:5 New Living Translation (NLT)